When I was a teen my mother and I would shop together for clothing quite a bit and because we were the same height with the same overall frame, we could share and essentially expand our wardrobe as a result which was a huge bonus. While I have memories of fun trips to the mall of us getting some great deals, carrying our shopping bags in the crook of our arm while eating frozen yogurt together and laughing, I also have other memories. I remember my mom trying on outfits and because of her youthful appearance for her age many sales clerks would think we were sisters often telling her she looked far too young to have a daughter my age. While some might see it as an ego boost, I think all this flattery may have gone to her head as she became even more engrossed in her physical appearance. She would often ask: “Does this dress make me look fat?” When I replied with a NO, she’d say, “Are you sure? Do you think I look too old for this?”
Even at that age I found her lack of confidence in the ‘dressing’ department and need for such constant validation as it pertained to how she looked quite annoying and not at all something that I wanted to emulate. I promised myself I wouldn’t be that woman with my friends or my significant other. To this day she tends to still fuss about and obsess over her physical appearance to the point of dressing much younger than her age. It’s hard to live in the present moment and enjoy the company around you when you’re focused on yourself all the time. Besides, what man is attracted to a woman without confidence and who constantly second guesses herself and her decisions? I also knew that the last thing I’d want to do it point out my areas that may have needed a bit of improvement. It’s always more fun to focus on the areas which you feel best about.
We’ve all had friends or other ladies in our life who have asked that dreaded question: “Does this make me look fat?” and to this question I have the following reply below as it pertains to being a classy woman.
Part of being a classy woman includes being a confident woman who is decisive in her choices-that is one of her most attractive qualities! She isn’t wishy-washy and always asking others for their opinion nor does she require their validation. She takes the time to learn about and appreciate herself, others and the things which are important to her so she can make the best decisions possible with boldness and without regret!
Did anyone else grow up with a mother or friend who always asked this question. How did you respond and what did you take away from their behavior?
Thanks for Reading!